Choose Joy!

choose joy

As we have talked about this week, there are ways that we can bring that joy into our lives that we so crave.  We can focus on the Savior, we can serve others,  we can remember our worth and that we are so loved.  And we can make an intentional decision to have more joy in our lives.

I hope that as we have discussed joy this week that you have taken the time to record your feelings in a journal.  And if you don’t have a journal, please take the time to go out and find a cute little notebook that speaks to you. I promise it will bring you a little joy just doing that.

I have found that finding joy in daily living is totally a process.  Let’s face it, some days are just better than others.  This whole week I have been sick (head cold), all I have really wanted to do is lay down and sleep it all off.  But I have felt so strongly lately that I need to be more consistent in sharing my thoughts and feelings somewhere besides a pretty little journal.  Although I highly recommend that and I won’t stop writing in mine, it is also important to follow through on our promptings and impressions.  We are all here to help each other.

This blog is about finding hope and joy.  And while it happens to be filled with my personal experiences, I would love nothing more than to have guest writers come in and talk about experiences that they’ve had in finding joy in daily life.  If this is something that you’d be interested in please DM me.  Or I can just share your story anonymously, I can’t wait to hear from you.  Have a great weekend!  I’ll see you next week!

XO Wendy

 

Joy in Serving

Joy Blooms in ServiceWhen I was a young mother, I had just had my fourth child.  There were some complications during the birthing process.  Consequently my precious tiny boy was rushed to Primary Children’s Medical Center in Salt Lake City.  For most of the 12 days that he spent in the NICU we wondered if he would be coming home at all.  It was heart wrenching to see that tiny little body lay lifeless in the incubator except for the machine that was helping him breath.  I remember feeling so overwhelmed with heartache, pain and anguish, blaming myself for something that I may have done during my pregnancy.  I had wished so hard for this baby to be born early and now he was, (2 weeks) and at what cost?  What Had I done. It was a terrifying experience that many young couples experience when their child is born with medical issues.  Luckily for us, his stay was brief and we were able to bring him home with just a feeding tube, which he was able to go without in just a few days of being home.

But what I really wanted to talk about today is the joy that can be had through serving others.  That experience with my little boy was hard but it was made bearable by the people who stepped up to serve us.  Bringing meals, taking care of our other children, giving phone calls of encouragement.

One particular act of service was so sweet and thoughtful that it left an impression on me to this day.  One day as I arrived home from the hospital I found a beautiful Easter Lily on my porch.  It was not in full bloom.  Just a couple of blooms were visible.  But it had many buds ready to bloom.  Inside the card that was placed so tenderly among the flowers, it read something like this:  “I know that this has been a really hard time for you.  We wanted to give you something to look forward to each day as you go through this trial.  These beautiful white lilies are precious and gentle just as your baby boy.  They take time to be nourished and to bloom fully.  Hopefully, by the time your little one recovers and is able to come home, the lilies will be in full bloom.”

What a sweet way for us to count down the days until he was able to come home.  And the lilies were in full bloom by the time he was better.

That little act of service brought so much joy into my life when the days were long and hard.

Today, look for small ways that you can reach out and serve others.  It’s the start of the holiday season and a time that we all want to spread joy.  So start today and make someone’s day a little brighter.

XO Wendy

 

We All Matter|We Are Here to Love

 

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about all of the love and support that I have had over the years.  I am so, so grateful for it.  Let’s face it, this life can be difficult sometimes and it’s nice to have someone to talk to and lean on.  I believe that we are all here to help each other on this journey through life.  Whether it be by kind and simple acts of service or being a shoulder to cry on, or someone to hang out with.  Sometimes it is even through the roughest moments of our lives that someone comes along and is able to give us the push we need to move forward or says the exact right thing we need to hear.  I call that divine intervention and I don’t believe it is a coincidence at all.

Some people may not believe that there is a divine being that cares about us more than we can ever imagine, and that’s ok.  We are all different and have different paths and journeys that we take in this life. As I always say, I can only speak from own experience.  But there are so many other people’s experiences in this life that we can learn and grow from.  And if we shut people out because they don’t believe exactly as we do, we are literally passing judgement on them.  Does not Jesus Christ (whom I believe is that supreme being for me and all of us), say in Matthew 7:1-2?

Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.

I have spoken of this subject before. But I firmly and so totally believe that we are going to speak at some point for how we judge our fellow men.  I believe that is a question that we will be asked, “How did you treat others? How did you think of others?  Were you your brother’s keeper?”  No matter the situation that we came to this world in, all people including ourselves, are deserving of unconditional true love and charity in it’s deepest form.

In this world, unfortunately, we are so completely bombarded with judgement and selfishness and harshness from those we love the most and those who don’t know us at all.   There is so much negativity in this world as we know it.

Fortunately for us there is an opposite side to that negativity.  However there must always be a push and pull, or good and bad.  In the Book of Mormon, another testament of Jesus Christ, we read in 2 Nephi 2:11

11 For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad.

With that being said, we must embrace positivity with all that we are.  And upon on doing that we must grow in acceptance and love, pure and unconditional, that reaches out and fills the cups of others.  Can we not accept the fact that we are and always will each be individuals in this the human race?  We are all human beings!  That doesn’t make us any better or worse than the person sitting next us.  We are each deserving and worthy of love and light! Our responsibility is to see the divinity in others, no matter what situations they may be in.  We need to be better , we need to do better in that treatment of each and every one we come into contact with.

I’m certainly not saying that I’m am perfect at this in any way!  In fact quite the opposite.  I am such a work in progress.  That is why I write what I do.  It is usually because of some experience that I have had that inspires me to speak about something like this.

Jesus taught us so much in parables about the way we are to love and treat each other.  Did he not teach the parable of the good Samaritan?  And the prodigal son?  Those who labored in the vineyard, some that came in the morning and some that came in the evening to work, yet all were payed the same? Do these parables not teach us that we are equal in His eyes?  That we need to treat each other with respect and divinity, no matter how differently we may think or act or look? Are we not all deserving of this great love that Jesus so spoke of?  The answer is a resounding YES!  We are all deserving, all worthy and we are all worth it!

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the Quorum of the twelve apostles said, God sees you not only as mortal being on small planet who lives for a brief season—He sees you as His child. He sees you as the being you are capable and  designed to become. He wants you to know that you matter to Him.”

Yes we are worthy of and worth His love.  Which in turn means that we are worthy and worth the love of others, no matter the circumstances or the choices that have been made on our individual journeys.  Remember we have our journey and other people have their journey.  We all respond and learn differently.  But we are asked to love others without condition. speaking of the two great commandants in  Mark 12:31 we read:

31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt lovethy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.

I will completely and wholeheartedly take responsibility for my own shortcomings in this  area.  I have so much to learn and so many people to accept and love. And I’m am so grateful to the supreme being who loves me and knows my shortcomings and doesn’t expect me to be completely perfect.  He knows that I am going to fall short and yet loves me anyway.  He loves each of us anyway!  No matter how broken or  wronged or battered you feel, you do have one who loves you so greatly and so completely that He died that you might live!  You are important, you are loved, you are enough! You are the you that you were meant to be!  Embrace that.  Embrace others for the diversity that surrounds us.

We are SO blessed to live and love and have this great adventure that we call life!  My challenge is for myself and for you to go out today and love on someone who needs your love.  Love so hard that you forget that they are different and think different than you do.  Love them unconditionally and perfectly.  As that is how our maker loves us.  “As I have loved you, LOVE one another!”

34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. John 13:34-35

 

 

 

Enlightened and Rejuvenated!

If you have read very much on this blog, then you know that I have a deep and abiding love for my Savior Jesus Christ and all that He has done, and continues to do for me.  Every 6 months, the church that I belong to, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, has a General Conference meeting.  In this meeting we are taught and counseled by our leaders and those that we believe are called of God at this time and day to lead and guide us in the way that we should go.  We believe that just as in times of old,  we have a prophet on the Earth today, President Russell M. Nelson.  We also believe that we have 12 apostles, just as in Christ’s day, that are called by Him to be His disciples.  They are admonished to finish their days on the Earth teaching, preaching, and loving every man, as taught in the books of the New Testament.  What a privilege it is then, to be able to hear, learn and ponder the messages they share with us each Spring and Fall.  If you are interested in viewing any of these messages you can find them here.

The conference held this past weekend was no different than past conferences.  At this time in my life, I try to spend the days and weeks preceding General Conference (I haven’t always been so diligent), preparing my heart and mind to be open to the messages that God has for me personally.  I was especially mindful this time.  I had some very specific questions that I needed answers to.  I was not disappointed.  Not only did all my questions get answered, but very rapidly as the conference began. (They never all get answered, haha). It was if a book had been laid in front of me to the exact page I needed.  And I was privy to the knowledge and answers that my heart yearned for.  And as you may know, those answers are not always the answers that we want to hear, but they are the answers that we NEED to hear.

I won’t say what the questions were or the answers that came, as they are deeply personal.  But, I was assured  once again of the deep and unfailing love that my Savior has for me and indeed for all of us.

I was struck by so many of the messages that the tears began to flow and did so mightily.  I loved every message from our beloved prophet and all of the apostles for sure!  But here are a few of the messages and links to hear them, that especially touched me this time.

One of the answers to my questions came with the very first speaker.  Elder Ulysses Soares.  He taught us of the importance of living and teaching the gospel to our friends and loved ones.  And the importance of teaching, and raising our children in the light of the Gospel. To teach them that they have a Father in Heaven who loves them.  That Jesus Christ, His son, is the Redeemer of the world.  We need to be rooted in the rock of the Redeemer that we may know that as we learn of Him and come close to him we shall never hunger or thirst. Isaiah 49 :10

10 They shall not hunger nor thirst; neither shall the heat nor sun smite them: for he that hath mercy on them shall lead them, even by the springs of water shall he guide them.

LOVE, LOVE, LOVED Sister Sharon L. Eubanks.  She taught that we need to be “plugged in” to the source of light, even Jesus Christ our Savior and Redeemer.   That He is the one that heals us , picks us up and dusts us off and joins with us to pull our heavy burdens.  She taught that in our afflictions He will keep His promises and He will always be with us as taught in the book of Mosiah from the Book of Mormon: Chapter 24

13 And it came to pass that the voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort, for I know of the covenant which ye have made unto me; and I will covenant with my people and deliver them out of bondage.

14 And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.

She taught how to access the light of the Savior.  We need only knock and he is there waiting to help is in any way He possibly can.

Matthew Chapter 7

¶ Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

She taught that we should use our light!  We may only be one bulb on a tree but we still shine our small light!

And so many more good messages came from her talk, I hope that you will listen to and be edified.

One other one that really touched me was Kyle S. Mckay . He taught that the Lord’s timing does not equal our timing.  Sometimes we go through things that seem never ending.  But the Lord will not forsake us, nor forget us.   Though we may not see immediate answers or relief in our situations, we can be sure that the Lord will still send us immediate blessings to help us while we are waiting on the greater blessing.  We access this by praying with real intent and full purpose of heart.  And then we recognize and praise God  for those tender mercies that come.  Quoted from the Book of Mormon in  Mosiah chapter 5

10 And again, when they thought of the immediate goodness of God, and his power in delivering Alma and his brethren out of the hands of the Lamanites and of bondage, they did raise their voices and give thanks to God. 

Oh there were just so many good messages.  I feel rejuvenated and edified and spiritually fed.  I am so grateful for the Gospel in my life and the great strength it brings me.  In times of plenty as in times of trial.

I hope that you will take some time to ponder and study the messages that were taught, as I know they come from God and are intended to lift, edify and help us through whatever we may be going through.  You can find out more about my faith, General Conference and Jesus Christ by clicking here.

 

Am I enough?

Why is it that we, especially women, think that we need to be completely perfect?  From our head to our toes, inside and out, we are constantly chasing that ever elusive perfection!  This thought has been on my mind quite consistently over the past several months as I have thought back over my life and the many mistakes that I have made in search of “perfection”.

It seems I always come back to my illness, because it is part of who I am and has helped shape me into the work-in-progress that I am today.  But I haven’t always felt that way.  In fact it is a day to day struggle to accept that this is part of who I am.  My personal struggle to let my light shine through the darkness, at times, becomes diminished because I let doubt and fear creep in.  I let Satan convince me that I am not enough.  But what I have learned over the years, is that I can, through His Grace, be perfected in Him! That no matter how hard I try, I can’t earn Christ’s love because it is freely and fully given to me.  It is His great gift to all of us!

In the Book of Mormon, Moroni counsels us in 10:32 Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you…

What we are aiming for is to become accepting of His Grace by showing gratitude and showing love.  Not only to others, but to ourselves.  We are relentlessly harder on ourselves than anyone else.  We tell ourselves constantly that we are not enough. We demean and discredit ourselves instead of lifting and building ourselves.  We must stop it!  We must learn to love ourselves. After all it is the second great commandment love thy neighbor as thyself… not, love thy neighbor and forget thyself.  No! LOVE THYSELF! YOU ARE ENOUGH!

you are enough

There is no shame in wanting to improve and become better.  In fact, that is the purpose of this life right?  We are trying for perfection, even though it is something that will not be attained in this life.  It is “toxic perfectionism” that we are trying to avoid. What makes perfectionism so toxic is that while those in its grip desire success, they are most focused on avoiding failure.  We must learn to embrace failure.  Avoiding toxic perfectionism doesn’t mean that we quit or give up. No, we keep trying.  Though the road may be long and hard and winding, we must press forward with steadfastness in Christ, knowing that He will make up the difference in the end.

One truth that I have come to understand is that Satan tries to convince us of all that we are not!  Satan’s biggest lie is that we have to be perfect! And we have to do that all on our own.  It is a tool that he is using, and quite successfully I might add.  So many of us are convinced that we have to be perfect in every way and that if we fall short, if we fail, then there must be something that we are doing wrong, there must be something wrong with us.   And so we just try to push harder, we wear ourselves and our souls out trying. We become over stressed and our light begins to dim.

Satan’s deception keeps us from perfection.  It produces shame because we become so consumed with having to do everything right that when we fail (and we will), we feel ashamed and unworthy of Christ’s Grace.  But failure is not a sign of imperfection, it is a sign of progression.  If we aren’t failing then we aren’t trying. And the important part is to not give up, to get back up after we fail and try again. But in that process remember that you need Christ.  You need His Grace!  It is that process that creates and builds confidence and love for ourselves.

After all, it is Christ who said “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in Heaven is perfect” Matthew 5:48.   Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the twelve apostles said “Surely the Lord would never give us a commandment that he knew we could not keep.”  “If we persevere, then somewhere in eternity our refinement will be finished and complete.”

The Savior convinces us of all that we are and all that we can be!  He says come unto me and I will make you better than you can be on your own! Because He loves us, because we are His. What He wants us to know is that we are enough.  That through Him we can overcome the obstacles, we can move forward and build ourselves up.  Turn on your light!  And let it shine bright!  You ARE enough!

We don’t have to be perfect, in fact we will never be perfect in this lifetime. So give yourself a break from chasing that “toxic perfectionism”.  Keep trying, keep pushing, keep moving forward but realize that His Grace is sufficient.  YOU ARE ENOUGH!