A New Normal

We are living in a world that is going to have a “new normal”.  As the events of the past few months have unfolded before us, we’ve felt many emotions.  Fear, Shock, disappointment, loss, suffering, helplessness, hopelessness, and many more.  

For some that are single or live alone, loneliness and isolation have been a big part of the past month. As well as those who have had to isolate because of infection by the virus. Or people who have been otherwise hospitalized, who have had to do so without the support of loved ones by their  side.  

Whether for a sickness, or lingering illness, or the joyous event of delivering a baby.  Which has been bittersweet, both joyful and heartbreaking to not be able to share that experience in person with friends and family 

At the same time, as we have practiced social distancing and followed the “stay safe, stay at home”  orders that have been implemented in many states, we’ve felt a closeness to our families that may have been lost.  We’ve been comforted by the fact that we are experiencing the same feelings as people all over the world. We’ve felt joy, compassion, love, tenderness, empathy for those working on the front lines and those who are ill. We’ve mourned for those who have lost their jobs and livelyhood and those that have had to give up dreams that they’ve worked their whole life for. 

Many of us have developed a great love for our leaders.  Whether they be government, church, educators, scientists, healthcare workers, or even company owners who have come forward to help in the face of tragedy.

We’ve felt a renewed love for our Lord and Savior and his atonement and suffering for all of us.  We have realized that we can not carry this burden alone. That nobody should carry these burdens alone. And so we have become united in purpose to eliminate and eradicate this awful virus that has infected not only our bodies, but our lives.

It has been incredible to witness the heroics of so many in our communities as we have faced the pandemic and world calamities (earthquakes and tornados, etc.).  Our hearts fill with gratitude as we see a world come together through something that can’t be seen but only felt.

As someone who already suffers from mental illness and the effects of isolation that it can bring,  I feel a deep compassion for those who have never experienced those feelings who now will find themselves in deep depressions.  Whether from loss, unemployment, isolation, financial struggles or family dysfunction which may have become front and center. Or those who will suffer PTSD from witnessing the most horrible experiences one can imagine. 

But I will forever be an optimist.  I know that we CAN come together as a nation and as a world to fight this horrible disease.  We can make our world whole again by the kindness and love and the attitude with which we choose to move forward.

Will it be easy?  Absolutely not. We have all experienced something that will forever be implanted in our very souls.  Something horrendous. But out of the ashes rises the Phoenix! We can rise as a nation/world. We can rebuild our world and each other instead of tearing each other down.

We can spread love and kindness and come together in a way that no one anticipated a few short months ago. We can find that “new normal” together.  We can build a new world from the love and common ground that we’ve found through the most tragic of events.  

We have been told that it may be much longer than anyone thought that we will be in this situation.  Both fighting for our lives and fighting to stay healthy. But through this time there are still ways that we can reach out.  There are still ways that we can stay healthy and maintain a good attitude. And with the Lord’s help we will conquer this pandemic while simultaneously building stronger families, friendships and communities.

Revelation Chapter 21

3 And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God.

4 And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

5 And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new

A new normal? Yes.  But possibly a better way of life? Most definitely!

All my love,

XO Wendy

 

Questions to Ponder…

What would the Savior do?  What would He say?  How would he handle this particular circumstance?

These are the questions that I pondered this week as my social media feed filled with the opinions and thoughts of others concerning a certain large event that took place over the weekend.   I am sure you can guess what it was and I don’t feel the need to name what it was because of the controversy that has been stirred up over it.

I thought I could stay silent like the many that have.  Or I could join in with the rationalizations that are happening.  Or I could have the courage to take a stand.  “Stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.”, is a quote that I grew up believing in.

Nevertheless, I am just going to drop this here and you can do with it what you will.  Just like everyone that has voiced an opinion, this is merely my opinion.  You don’t have to agree with it.  That’s the great thing about opinions and discussions.  They are food for thought.  Then you get to take those thoughts and figure out where you stand and what you will do with it.

Over these past few days there has been a portion of a talk that I haven’t been able to get out of my head.  President Nelson shared this talk at the General Women’s conference last October.  I am posting it here so you don’t have to go digging for it. I had to go back and listen again because there was one statement that kept rolling around in my head.

“…my dear sisters, your ability to discern truth from error, to be society’s guardians of morality, is crucial in these latter days. And we depend upon you to teach others to do likewise. Let me be very clear about this: if the world loses the moral rectitude of its women, the world will never recover.

I remember the seriousness in his tone as he spoke those words.  He began that thought by stating the following:

“Now a little word of warning. There are those who would undermine your ability to call upon the power of God. There are some who would have you doubt yourself and minimize your stellar spiritual capacity as a righteous woman…

…Satan and his minions will constantly contrive roadblocks to prevent you from understanding the spiritual gifts with which you have been and can be blessed.”

I don’t want to say too much about my personal experience with my own thoughts and ponderings this week, because the idea of me even writing this is to get you to take a look at your own thoughts and what your heart and mind is telling you.

I personally have many mixed thoughts and could actually sit on both sides of the fence.  But what it all boils down to for me is this:

Where do we draw the line?  When do we say enough is enough?  If I am uncomfortable with something, do I have the moral fortitude to turn away from it?

So yes, I personally was completely offended by what I saw and witnessed and feel awful that I didn’t walk away.  I have learned the lesson that I personally was meant to learn.  That in the future when something like this happens, I just have to be strong enough to  “say no to some things, even though they may seem harmless.” (President Nelson).

I’m not naive, I know that this is a completely different world than the one I grew up in or even the one that I raised my children in.  However, when something happens that causes so much controversy and so many opinions, you have to check yourself and where you stand!  Even if it’s not popular and even if it’s a little uncomfortable.

Just a side note, for those of you that have a different opinion.  I completely respect you for having the courage to stand for what you believe in.

XO Wendy

Here is the talk:  the quotes I spoke of come around the the 6:10 mark.

 

 

Be grateful for today.

Be thankful for how far you’ve come and what you’ve learned along the way.  We only have one life!  

Don’t waste it away worrying about what you haven’t yet been able to do.  Make today great and full of gratitude and everything else will take care of itself.

Training in the off season.

The Lord is strong towerI was reading about Captain Moroni (the youngest Chief commander mentioned in the Book of Mormon) this week in chapters 46-52 and was impressed with the thought of how we can never quit preparing for the “race”.  We are in the race of a lifetime here on Earth.  Battling against Satan at every turn.  And even when we feel like we are at the top of our game, or winning the race, we can’t stop “training”.

When the Nephites battled under Captain Moroni’s command they fought for faith, liberty, their families, their land and their peace.  If ever we have been in a fight like Moroni’s, it is today!

In verses 10-13 of chapter 48 it describes some of the characteristics Moroni had and what kind of person he was.  Mighty and strong (at 25 years old), smart, compassionate, had courage, was grateful, worked hard, he served the people, was faithful and full of integrity and he was obedient.  He was such a good man that in verse 17 it reads: Yea, verily, verily I say unto you, if all men had been, and were, and ever would be, like unto Moroni behold, the very powers of hell would have been shaken forever; Yea the devil would never have power over the hearts of the children of men

First of all it talks about the way that he taught them to never raise arms unless it was against an enemy to preserve their lives. Then they armed themselves with shields and helmets and breastplates to protect themselves from the enemy.  They put on all their armour.  Then he fortified the land.

But what stood out to me in all of these chapters as they fought their enemies, was that even after they had conquered their first conflict, he did not take a break.  After the people had praised and remembered the Lord and given all credit to Him, Moroni knew that he needed to continue to prepare the land and his people for when the wars would start again.

It says that he commanded the people that they should dig up heaps of earth around the city. Then on top of those ridges add timbers the height of a man. Then on top of those timbers a frame of pickets and they were strong and high. But not only that, he had them build towers so they could see when the enemy was approaching.  And also places of security to be built upon those towers.  They called all these “strongholds” which defined, is a well fortified place or fortress.  Moroni was teaching the people how to keep from being defeated.  And I believe that this means both temporally and spiritually.

So the question I have for you today, is how will you build up “strongholds” in your own life?  How will you continue training for the race of life?  Will you sit down once one race has been won or will you keep training even in the off season?

I have some recommendations here.  But ultimately you will have to decide for yourself what you will do to build your own “strongholds” against the enemy.  Because you/we are in this fight for our lives!

Have a great day!

XO Wendy

 

Consistency is Key

Ok So yesterday we talked about making changes and just taking one step in a positive direction. How’d you do? Hopefully it lit a fire under you to make a change that will move you closer to who you want to be. And now how do you make that happen? How do you become what or who you want to be? CONSISTENCY is the Key!
consistency.png
Guys, I’m not kidding when I talk about this. It’s a critical part of the decision that you just made to make a change. Now, your challenge is going to be that you stay consistent in your goal. Meaning you work on it every day. Every day. Every day! What does that look like?

It looks like filling your life and your mind with the things that support the step forward that you have taken or the change that you are instituting.

When I was a young mom and my children all started school. I decided that I wanted to do something or make a change that would help me kind of find my identity as a woman again. Not something completely selfish but something where I could improve myself and help others along the way.

I had a friend that had encouraged me to get into pageantry. Run for a MRS. title. And so after brooding about it and feeling stuck and telling myself all kinds of reasons why I couldn’t do it. I finally decided to make a move forward. Just do it. I made that decision and then I moved! And you know what? It was one of the best experiences of my life. I got to see so many positive changes in myself and others, because we had a “platform” which was something that we believed strongly about and wanted to make a difference with. I chose mentoring and worked with Big Brothers, Big Sisters of America. I got to see changes in myself, but more importantly, I got to see other’s lives change through me. I didn’t win the title that first year, but because I worked hard and I was super consistent, I placed first runner up. So of course I knew that I would do it again the next year because naturally I wanted to win. 😉

But in order to do that, I had to continue to be consistent. I didn’t just stop working after that first pageant (in the off season). I didn’t procrastinate until it came closer to that next pageant. I worked my tail off. Physically, mentally and spiritually and also with the children that I worked with (including my own family), so that I would be able to present my best self.

And it totally paid off! I won the title of Mrs. Utah in 2001. I reached that goal, and it felt so good to know that I had really made some positive changes in the lives of those around me, my family, my relationships and especially in myself. But a big thing that I learned through that experience is that it wasn’t the end goal that mattered most. It was the things that I learned on journey by being consistent and working hard!

Now that’s a story that I don’t share a lot about because since that time there have been a lot of other changes in my life that have become incredible moments for me. But it was a defining moment for me because I realized I could do hard things! And I could reach big goals! But I had to be consistent in working towards those goals. And so can you!

Take the choice you made for change and make consistent steps toward that change everyday. Everyday. Everyday!

XO

 

Taking action

Yesterday we talked about action words.  And Last week we talked about how powerful “words” can be.  Especially from our own self talk. In order to make lasting change you have to take action.  You can’t just think or wish that things will happen.  You have to take action and move somewhere, whether that’s forward or backward, you have to move.

And you have to believe in yourself and talk positively “I can do this”!  Because you can.

So many times we get so many different pans in the oven (and I am famous for this), that when it comes to taking action, we become frozen because there are so many choices.  Where do I go first?  How do I make this change in my life?

But the important part is that you just have to make a choice, and then MOVE!  This choice is not going to determine the rest of your life.  It is one step in a positive direction.  Take the step.  Move forward, then evaluate and take another step.

Ready, fire, aim

I listen to several podcasts about self-development or improvement and one that I listen to is called Next Level Life by Preston Pugmire.  In it he talks a lot about changing your mindset and also about a  strategy or idea called Ready, Fire, Aim.  This is a bit different than what we usually hear (ready, aim, fire).  He teaches the idea that we have to pull back the arrow and “fire” (act, do something), then see where the arrow lands, then evaluate and take another shot.  But the point being we have to MAKE A MOVE.

As we come up on the end of the year.  I hope that we will come at it sprinting to the end of it.  And then breaking through the tape and running straight on into 2020 full steam.  We can change, we can take control and start seeing the results of our effort!

I love this quote from Philip Floor’s book Ready, Fire, Aim.  ” Expecting things to change, without being willing to change, will result in no change—because nothing changed.”

Have a great day, we’ll do it again tomorrow.

XO Wendy

Joy in Serving

Joy Blooms in ServiceWhen I was a young mother, I had just had my fourth child.  There were some complications during the birthing process.  Consequently my precious tiny boy was rushed to Primary Children’s Medical Center in Salt Lake City.  For most of the 12 days that he spent in the NICU we wondered if he would be coming home at all.  It was heart wrenching to see that tiny little body lay lifeless in the incubator except for the machine that was helping him breath.  I remember feeling so overwhelmed with heartache, pain and anguish, blaming myself for something that I may have done during my pregnancy.  I had wished so hard for this baby to be born early and now he was, (2 weeks) and at what cost?  What Had I done. It was a terrifying experience that many young couples experience when their child is born with medical issues.  Luckily for us, his stay was brief and we were able to bring him home with just a feeding tube, which he was able to go without in just a few days of being home.

But what I really wanted to talk about today is the joy that can be had through serving others.  That experience with my little boy was hard but it was made bearable by the people who stepped up to serve us.  Bringing meals, taking care of our other children, giving phone calls of encouragement.

One particular act of service was so sweet and thoughtful that it left an impression on me to this day.  One day as I arrived home from the hospital I found a beautiful Easter Lily on my porch.  It was not in full bloom.  Just a couple of blooms were visible.  But it had many buds ready to bloom.  Inside the card that was placed so tenderly among the flowers, it read something like this:  “I know that this has been a really hard time for you.  We wanted to give you something to look forward to each day as you go through this trial.  These beautiful white lilies are precious and gentle just as your baby boy.  They take time to be nourished and to bloom fully.  Hopefully, by the time your little one recovers and is able to come home, the lilies will be in full bloom.”

What a sweet way for us to count down the days until he was able to come home.  And the lilies were in full bloom by the time he was better.

That little act of service brought so much joy into my life when the days were long and hard.

Today, look for small ways that you can reach out and serve others.  It’s the start of the holiday season and a time that we all want to spread joy.  So start today and make someone’s day a little brighter.

XO Wendy