Category: Happiness

Consistency is Key

Ok So yesterday we talked about making changes and just taking one step in a positive direction. How’d you do? Hopefully it lit a fire under you to make a change that will move you closer to who you want to be. And now how do you make that happen? How do you become what or who you want to be? CONSISTENCY is the Key!
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Guys, I’m not kidding when I talk about this. It’s a critical part of the decision that you just made to make a change. Now, your challenge is going to be that you stay consistent in your goal. Meaning you work on it every day. Every day. Every day! What does that look like?

It looks like filling your life and your mind with the things that support the step forward that you have taken or the change that you are instituting.

When I was a young mom and my children all started school. I decided that I wanted to do something or make a change that would help me kind of find my identity as a woman again. Not something completely selfish but something where I could improve myself and help others along the way.

I had a friend that had encouraged me to get into pageantry. Run for a MRS. title. And so after brooding about it and feeling stuck and telling myself all kinds of reasons why I couldn’t do it. I finally decided to make a move forward. Just do it. I made that decision and then I moved! And you know what? It was one of the best experiences of my life. I got to see so many positive changes in myself and others, because we had a “platform” which was something that we believed strongly about and wanted to make a difference with. I chose mentoring and worked with Big Brothers, Big Sisters of America. I got to see changes in myself, but more importantly, I got to see other’s lives change through me. I didn’t win the title that first year, but because I worked hard and I was super consistent, I placed first runner up. So of course I knew that I would do it again the next year because naturally I wanted to win. 😉

But in order to do that, I had to continue to be consistent. I didn’t just stop working after that first pageant (in the off season). I didn’t procrastinate until it came closer to that next pageant. I worked my tail off. Physically, mentally and spiritually and also with the children that I worked with (including my own family), so that I would be able to present my best self.

And it totally paid off! I won the title of Mrs. Utah in 2001. I reached that goal, and it felt so good to know that I had really made some positive changes in the lives of those around me, my family, my relationships and especially in myself. But a big thing that I learned through that experience is that it wasn’t the end goal that mattered most. It was the things that I learned on journey by being consistent and working hard!

Now that’s a story that I don’t share a lot about because since that time there have been a lot of other changes in my life that have become incredible moments for me. But it was a defining moment for me because I realized I could do hard things! And I could reach big goals! But I had to be consistent in working towards those goals. And so can you!

Take the choice you made for change and make consistent steps toward that change everyday. Everyday. Everyday!

XO

 

Taking action

Yesterday we talked about action words.  And Last week we talked about how powerful “words” can be.  Especially from our own self talk. In order to make lasting change you have to take action.  You can’t just think or wish that things will happen.  You have to take action and move somewhere, whether that’s forward or backward, you have to move.

And you have to believe in yourself and talk positively “I can do this”!  Because you can.

So many times we get so many different pans in the oven (and I am famous for this), that when it comes to taking action, we become frozen because there are so many choices.  Where do I go first?  How do I make this change in my life?

But the important part is that you just have to make a choice, and then MOVE!  This choice is not going to determine the rest of your life.  It is one step in a positive direction.  Take the step.  Move forward, then evaluate and take another step.

Ready, fire, aim

I listen to several podcasts about self-development or improvement and one that I listen to is called Next Level Life by Preston Pugmire.  In it he talks a lot about changing your mindset and also about a  strategy or idea called Ready, Fire, Aim.  This is a bit different than what we usually hear (ready, aim, fire).  He teaches the idea that we have to pull back the arrow and “fire” (act, do something), then see where the arrow lands, then evaluate and take another shot.  But the point being we have to MAKE A MOVE.

As we come up on the end of the year.  I hope that we will come at it sprinting to the end of it.  And then breaking through the tape and running straight on into 2020 full steam.  We can change, we can take control and start seeing the results of our effort!

I love this quote from Philip Floor’s book Ready, Fire, Aim.  ” Expecting things to change, without being willing to change, will result in no change—because nothing changed.”

Have a great day, we’ll do it again tomorrow.

XO Wendy

Changes….

 

butterflies changeIt’s Monday and Mondays are always a good time to renew our promises to ourselves and maybe set some new goals for the week.  Even when things haven’t gone the way we would have hoped in the previous week, we can’t let that stand in the way of improvement.

Today I want to talk a little bit about change.  For one, it is about the only constant that we can count on in our lives.  Situations that are beyond our control can change everything in moment.  Our bodies are constantly in a state of change.  Jobs change, relationships change, and the weather changes.  Some things, like the weather change on a daily basis.  And other things like our moods for example take more time.

We are well into the Fall/Winter season and so many that suffer from SAD (seasonal affective disorder) are probably having some pretty rough days. As the days become shorter and more cold, our moods can become darker and more cold as well.

I was talking to my husband about how MY mood is doing this time around for the Fall/Winter season.  It is probably the first time in a very long time that I am still doing well at this time of year.  Of course we are only about a quarter of the way into the changing of the seasons. 🙂

Some of the reasons for this are very traceable.  I have done a lot of work on my mental health over the past 4 years.  It certainly has not been easy and it has not been quick.  It has however, been extremely worth the effort.  I am much more balanced than I have been in past years as far as the 10 habits that I talked about here and here.

But I think even more than that, I have finally come to a sort of acceptance of what bipolar IS to me and what it IS NOT.  (And this goes for other illnesses and disorders as well). It IS something that I HAVE.  It is NOT something that I AM.  It does not define me, or who I am as a person. There is so much more to me than being sick.  It IS something that changes me mentally.  It IS NOT something that I have no control over.  I DO have a choice.  There was a time that I believed that I didn’t have choice.  That this is just my cross to bear and I have no say in it.

But that’s only partially true.  It is something that I have to bear, but there is A LOT that I can do to change, not only how I view it, but also how I live with it, as illustrated in the links above that I mentioned.  But the first and most important step, is to stop being “stuck” make a choice of where you want to be and then take a step in that direction.  It doesn’t have to be a gigantic decision.  But DO something to move you forward!

I believe one of the most significant changes that I have made in the past few years that has made an incredible difference is that I have learned that there is only one person that I can turn to in my times of greatest need.  And that is my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  He is the healer, He has transformed me in a way that I never could have managed on my own. But that didn’t just happen either.  It has taken a lot of work and continues to be  an ongoing process.  But I had to make the choice that I was going to TURN (action) toward the Lord.  That I was going to ASK (action) for help.  In the Bible it says:

7  Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find;  knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. (Matthew 7:7-8)

ASK, SEEK, and KNOCK are all action words.  We can not just expect things to happen for us.  It is something that we have to work toward.  And it is an ongoing work that changes every day.  But it is one that we do not have to do on our own.  We will always have the Lord there to support us and cheer us on.  He wants us to be successful and happy and feel loved.  He wants us to know that we are worth it!  And He is just waiting for us to ask.

So today, ponder the word change which means to make or become different, transform.  Then decide to make the choice that you want your life to be different… better!

XO Wendy

Come…

Last week I was able to listen to the wife of President Rhys A. Weaver, Pamela, speak. They are the Nashville Tennessee mission leaders.   I was deeply touched by the things that she talked about.  Most of her talk revolved around one word, “come”.  She talked about the sweetness of that word and how we use it so much on a daily basis.  “Come with me to lunch.”  “Come give mommy a hug.”  Come read me a story.” “Come and pray with me.” Come with me to visit grandma.”  Come and see what I have for you.”  “Come shopping with me.” Etc.

What a beautiful word that is, so inviting and so warm.  There are so many times in the scriptures that the Savior invites us to “Come”, Come follow me.  When we think of all the ways that word is used so lovingly, doesn’t it make that plea to come follow Him even more tender? In Matthew 19:21 we read: Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me.

We had the missionaries from our church, over for dinner not too long ago and they shared a video with us that just has such feel good message that I decided to share it here, its pretty short but I love the message.

One thing that I love about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints of which I am a member, is that we are so willing to serve.  We are a people full of faith and hope.  We are always some of the first responders whenever there is a natural disaster around the world.  And we are huge on helping refugees and the poor and needy.  It’s great to be a part of church that does it’s best to follow the Savior’s admonition to “Come follow me”.

We as members are far from perfect and are human just like everyone else.  So not everyone is as welcoming as some.  But we are trying to follow the Savior in all that we do.

As you know I share a lot of scriptures and talks here and I thought for those of you who aren’t familiar with our church, this would be a good place to share.

I would personally love to have you “come” and go to church or serve or go to an activity with me.  If you find yourself with no hope. Or if you have been away for a while like I had been. Come back! Come and Stay.

Have a good weekend everyone!

XO Wendy

Power of Hope

There are many days that I have struggled to understand the reason that I have had to deal with having bipolar.  It’s not easy to find hope when you are full of despair.  My whole life I’ve been through the ups and downs of it. I could go months and months with no signs of it and then all of sudden it was there like a cloudy, gloomy day.  Some days are wonderful, and other days I wondered if I’d make it through.

But good news!  I did.  And maybe one of the reasons that I’ve had to go through this is so that you can see that you can too!  I know that we are here to help make another’s burden light.

So how did I find hope? Well one truth that I can point to is that I knew that there was a reason for me to be here, to be alive.  I know that part of that came from my upbringing and knowing that there is a God and that He loves me.  But another part came from deep inside, just feeling that there was something more to all of this. Somehow I had hope.

Deiter F, Uchtdorf once said  “Hope has the power to fill our lives with happiness.  It’s absence– can make the heart sick.

Despair drains from us all that is vibrant and joyful and leaves behind the empty remnants of what life was meant to be, despair can seem like a staircase that leads only and forever downward.

Hope on the other hand, is like a beam of sunlight rising up and above the horizon of our present circumstances.  It pierces the darkness with a brilliant dawn.  It encourages and inspires us to place our trust in the loving care of an eternal Heavenly Father who has prepared a way for those who seek for eternal truth.”

The rest of that talk can be found here.

I love the vision of a beam of sunlight.  I can just picture it coming through the clouds and shining brightly and warmly on my soul. Giving me hope for a brighter day.

Today, let’s look outside of ourselves.  Let’s look for a way that we can make another’s burden a little lighter.  Just look around you, there are people everywhere that have hard things that they are dealing with and it doesn’t take much to give them some hope.  Remember that maybe you were given this mountain to show others that it can moved!  Pray and ask God who it is that needs your help today, and I promise he will show you.  And remember it only takes a tiny bit of hope to keep you from falling into despair.  Today choose to have hope.

XO Wendy